[Student Profile]
[Prompt & Essay]
Some students have a background, identity, interest or talent that is so meaningful they believe
their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your
story.
My parents are not the so-called immigrants that people imagine. “Expatriates” would be a better
classification. Moving and business trips were recurrent discussions at the dining table. All my life, it was made clear that they were unsure of when they were going back to their home. I am the child of those parents, categorized as “Nikkeijin”, Japanese American, or more specifically, “Nikkei Nisei,” second generation Japanese American. To other “Nikkeijin,” I'm not their kind. My family has no history in this country and my ties to Japan are closer. Exclusion from the community that I was supposedly a part of, in society standards, had stranded me in the no man’s land between my identities. “Who am I?” A simple question I have been longing to find an answer to. Japanese + American = Japanese American. It’s as easy as that. Or so I thought. A huge cloud of uncertainty encapsulated me as I struggled to answer the question, which sparked my introversion and masking of emotions. Ultimately, the term Japanese American was just a group of belonging. “Who am I?” “Where do I belong?” My journey to seek an answer was led by these questions. My first attempt at coping with this feeling, the summer before sophomore year, I joined a public middle school in my mom’s hometown in Hyogo, Japan for a week. Leading up to the first day of school, I binge watched Japanese TV shows to learn the ways of the rest. Conformity. Blending in.
Collared shirts. Guys with long pants and girls with pleated skirts. I sat in the back corner of the room wearing a knock-off school uniform I bought off Amazon. “Stand up.” To the queue, my surroundings were suddenly dimmed dark as a wall of students formed around me. Thinking that I must not be late, I briskly rose from my chair and took a bow. Chairs shuffled as the wall quickly demolished with only the teacher left standing on the podium in front of the chalkboard.
Surrounded by the Japanese language, customs, culture, way of living for the past few days, I made an effort to stay inside their bubble and not be an outlier. One day, the American teacher who teaches English Level 3 at the school walked up to my desk, asking about the classes I chose to take this year at [name] High School. At that moment, I forgot all about my intentions of fitting in. English words flowed out of my mouth naturally, as we swiftly made conversation for 10 minutes.
All my life, I was caught up in trying to find my belonging. I came to value the perspectives of my two cultures even more than before, but was there really a need for belonging in any group? I have accepted that I am the only one who can control my thoughts. So why not break free and venture?
Without limiting my actions and opportunities for growth, I will do whatever it takes to pave my own path and that path is what defines who I am. From the classes and extracurriculars I do to even the small things like the outfit I choose to wear each morning, I have made my own decisions with strong intentions.
A simple group doesn’t define who I am.
I am me.
“What should I try out now?”
“How can I get out of my comfort zone?”
These are the questions I ask myself.
So to answer the questions posed by past [student], “Who am I?” and “Where do I belong?”:
I am me and I belong right here.